this is my thought crime...

.bh

Sun, 03 Dec 2006 10:51:07 GMT

with so much faith, boy...

Sat, 11 Nov 2006 13:29:54 GMT

you're not going anywhere with where you really want to be..

there's too many places.

too little time.

...too many people....

none of them are mine.

too much..

there is just too much. and they think you're not enough.

528am

Sat, 11 Nov 2006 13:29:05 GMT

...you learn to sleep with the noise....

but i can't learn..

i just cant sleep.

Sat, 28 Oct 2006 19:06:29 GMT

out of madness, comes truth....

i will be with her some day..
she will see me, some day.
our feelings will touch, some day....

...

and they will all know how i love.

Thu, 09 Feb 2006 09:27:07 GMT

tinyrockets

compulsive, constant.

Thu, 19 Jan 2006 04:21:07 GMT

...I have not felt adequate for some days now...
Nothing interests me...
I walk some streets with half shut eyes because nothing is worth gaping at...
I have not seen any beauty for some days now.
I scared it all away.
I scared it all away.

I just got on the train and gave my body a hard and uncomfortable seat.
A man tried to start some habitual discourse with me..
I glanced and gagged and threw up on the newspaper in his lap.
He was not so very satisfied, but it would not have happened if he had seen the unpleasant look on my face.
I laughed.
I smirked.
And laughed.

You know... you talk to the people.. But they do not listen.. For a moment, it seems that you would want to sledge them in the face with your ordinary sledge.
It only works.
And then, after only then, will you have their undisclosed attention...
When they are hit hard with something only bigger than ordinary..

Sun, 15 Jan 2006 18:25:02 GMT

...well.. fuck i am an idiot. um... there is nothing again. abraham why you so dumb..? ...i want to go lay down in my bed. she is the pillow... o want the bed to soak me up.. lay deep in that bed.... it wont let me breathe anyways... just nothing.

i will see you again.. a long time from now.

Sun, 15 Jan 2006 11:00:58 GMT

please.. we have t opractice. i need to scream. practice screaming.. because tnoghitnf is working. i cant even write right. im not even right..

you know one of my old dreams...

i use to go down this barren road.. and come to this great big tree and sit... under the tree. and stare out... and there was only water then.... and nothing. me. a tree. limitless grass fields behind me... and water. i cant swim in hot sand.. but i sure can choke on it.... same with grass.

Mon, 10 Oct 2005 04:37:19 GMT

i realy wanted the places that i thought i could go to... please hear me on this... i wanted to go there. but it feels as if people raped me of those things that could have made me feel happy.. someoen talk to me..... someone that i want.. someone that i need... talk to me of something that will inspire... instead of taking from me, all that i know i want... and more..

Thu, 06 Oct 2005 07:47:40 GMT

Fri, 05 Aug 2005 02:27:31 GMT

i was thinking about fifteen minutes ago.. and. and i want to know how another person would think.. an artist.. painter.. sketch artist.. sculptor... photographer... a filmographer.. musicians... i know at least one person in each art catagory.. but i dont know them. there was once a girl named stephanie that live close to me here in new york.. we hung out a few times and she told me that she liked to stay a child. children are innocent and fun in their personality.. i not saying that its bad to want to stay as a child.. but, no matter what, i feel that you will always run into a problem that you need to be older in mind, to fix. she was fun and everything.. she was not immature at all, either.. but she lacked the "want" to see and learn about deeper things like feelings and the heart... i want someone to tell me their heart.. this one time... if yo come to me in any way.. and tell me how you areinmind and heart... i will tell you all of me.. tell me how you see things... i am drifting out of my self without you.. i am falling out of my mind..

...ps.there is something about you that makes me think that you dont want me anymore... that you think it is useless...

Thu, 04 Aug 2005 03:17:25 GMT

look what i have become. and my. greatest gift to you... it is what i do not know about, yet..

Fri, 06 May 2005 07:30:13 GMT

it rained all day.. i remember when days used to rain after i had cryed... its past spring now.. why is it still raining..? its something from the past.. like the past.